Chapter 12

“Is he okay?”

“Hes not dead is he?”

“What happened is he gonna be ok?” a mix of voices and questions were thrown at the doctor.

“Brandon Novak was extremely lucky. He seems to have an angel looking over him. He’ll make it.” Said the doctor happily, he hated telling families that a love one died.

A sigh of relief seem to flow though the group. April smiled though her tears as she hug Phil. Bam and the crew started hugging and laughing.

“Can we see him?” Bam asked

“He is still unconisous, and only immediate family is allowed to see him. Hospital policies. Sorry.”

April stood up and just said “We are more family then his real family could ever been. We love him more and care for him more.”

“Alright I’ll let one person see him. But you got to be quick I could lose my job, if the rest of you come back in a couple of days the rest of you can see him.”

“Thank you.” Said Phil

“His room is on the second floor 209. If a nurse stops you, just say you are his mother, brother, sister, wife, father anything.”

The doctor left to go check on a little girl with 104 fever.

“Ok who’s going?” asked Raab, “I don’t think I could seem him just yet”

“Me either.” Said April and Phil nodded in agreement.

“so one of you three: Bam, Ryan, or Dic,” said Jenn

“Rock paper scissors shoot?” suggested Dico.

“Yea”

“Ok, rock…paper…scissors…SHOoT!”

“I’m out, you both have rock and I got scissors.” Said Dico and he sat down.

“rock…paper…scissors…SHOoT!”

“YES! I win.” Shouted Bam a couple of people in the ER turned to stare at him. He ran toward the elevator.

“Floor 2” he mumbled to himself.

“205...206…207…208…here 209”

‘I don’t have to do this, I can turn around and no one would know. Hes going to be knock out anyway. I'll lie. But it would be turning my back on him when he needs me most. I can’t do that to him.’

He didn’t want to see Novak hurt and half dead but he couldn’t leave him alone. He slowly turned the doorknob and walked in. He stared at Novak’s body in the bed.

He had a tube down his throat, and there was this horrible beeping noise from on the machines hooked up to him. He looked so tiny lying in the bed.

“Hey Brandon, Waiting was so hard. I wanted to run in the room and save you myself. Why didn’t you tell me? You can tell me anything rember. God this is so hard. I just can’t believe you would do this. And you were doing so well. You hadn’t touch that shit in 2 years, and then Dunn finds you almost…almost. half dead. See look at what you did I’m fucking crying like a little girl cause of you Novak! That’s how scared you got me."

 

"I was so scared I was gonna loss you. Like I never…..got to tell you how much I consider you family. I hope you know how scared everyone. April was crying now stop. God you even had Raab crying and the last time I’ve seen him cry was when he pee on the fence. And Jenn was crying too. God dammit I don’t know wheater to be angry at you for this or to hug you and cry. But I got to go before I get in trouble. Everyone is gonna come see you in a couple of days. Bye Bran”

Bam walked down the hall into the bathroom and sat down and cried. He couldn’t stop no matter how hard he tried.

‘Novak? It couldn’t have been Novak. God im probably being Punk’d or something and everyone is gonna tell me how much of a baby I am or something.’

Bam got up and walked back down the hall with sunglasses on his eyes to cover up the tears.

They were all still sitting there. No one really spoke they just got in the cars and drove him. April lit a fire in the pirate bar and her and Phil said goodnight and walked up the stairs. They seem to have aged so fast. The guys decided to sit at the fireplace and all grab blankets and chairs and sat there.

Dico was the first to speak.

“Why didn’t he tell us? You know how bad of friends that makes us seem? We didn’t even notice anything. Now I can see it you know. I can see how he was. He lost his appetite and he wasn’t bringing home girls and he wasn’t him self.”

“You know last night when I was helping him to his room, he asked if I loved him. I just thought he was drunk and kidding. And I said No, I fucking told him no and push him into his room. God I’m such a fucking ass. Its all my fault he did it, I could have helped but noe I pushed him away!” Bam cried and for the first time he let others seem him cry.

Ryan put an arm around him.

“It’s not your fault Bam, no one noticed either. We are all to blame. We weren’t there for him.”

Raab who had been silent the whole time spoke up.

“I hate him he know he could have talk to us. He knows heroin was bad but yet he did. I hope he die stills!” and he walked up the stairs as the guys stared in horror.

No one spoke into they heard his door closed.

“I guess he’s still in shock. Him and Novak were kinda in the same boat with addictions. If Novak failed I think Raab thinks he’s gonna fail.” Dico said as he pulled his blanket closer.

Ryan took his arm off of Bam’s shoulder after Bam stopped crying and seem to be ok,

“I think Im gonna go for a walk, Don’t wait up.” Said Ryan as he pulled on his jacket.
They others nodded and started putting out the fire and going upstairs.

He walked past the Halfpint and into the woods. He shivered rembering the ghost stories they had told each other about the woods. They weren’t scary then, more like pitiful, but now Ryan felt horrified. He quicken his pace.

‘I don’t know why he didn’t tell anybody, I could have helped. I could have. I feel so horrible I didn’t even notice one of my friends were suicidal. How could I have missed it? I’m so fucking stupid! I never let him come drinking with me really and I never hung out with him. Not like we use to. This is going to be like Haggard again, I just know it. I’m gonna be the bad guy again.

 

I wonder if he was scared when he did it. If at the last moment he changed his mind but it was too late. God I would sell my bike just to see him smile and tell us it’s a joke. I don’t know how I didn’t notice it before, he hasn’t been him self in such a long time. He didn’t joke anymore and he got upset easy. We all should have noticed when he stopped bringing girls home and going to slept early. That’s something no one should have missed. But we did, we almost failed the game of life.’

Ryan finally realizing just how cold it was outside headed back home this time stick to the road instead of the woods.

He walked into his room and collapse on his bed dreaming that he hadn’t reached Novak in time and Novak died.